Do Not Feed The Monkeys

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They may communicate in a strange manner, but these apes can be very loving and passionate.

The only primates capable of laying eggs.

Their natural habitats include outer space, dreams and rainy cities.

Generous by nature, they don't let any member of their group go hungry.

They look past appearances: these monkeys look for inner beauty.

They are crazy about spotlights, flashes and teen-ape actresses.

They hate moving around the jungle on foot.

They organize themselves around charismatic and slightly genocidal alpha males.

They transform themselves, howl and change their fur with great ease.

These monkey put the happiness of their offspring before anything else.

They love sports and cleanliness. And, above all, they hate confined spaces.

The most creative and talented, although with a certain tendency towards scatology.

Monkeys with a passion for natural selection and the struggle between the species.

Apes with unimpeachable morality. ABSOLUTELY unimpeachable.

Good, caring, empathetic... These primates are morally acceptable.

Never trust them: they are the most immoral of all monkeys.

Obedient and helpful primates.

Very obedient and very helpful primates.

The most obedient and helpful monkeys: ALWAYS at the service of their keeper.

They go crazy over the most extreme emotions on the boob tube.

Half ape, half mole: these primates cannot keep their mouths shut.

The most faithful, loyal and discreet primates.

They like money almost as much as piggybanks do.

Now you see 'em, now you don't: these are the fastest monkeys in the jungle.

Big fans of maxing out their credit cards without leaving the tree.

Methodical and obsessive: they don't stop until their pencil is worn down to a stub.

Their appetite knows no limits. It's a good idea to keep a mop near them.

Amateur collectors. They always hold on to something as a souvenir.

Experienced collectors. They have a hard time letting go of anything.

Compulsive collectors. They hold on to everything, absolutely EVERYTHING.