Eat Lead

Start your first game. "Thanks for buying my game. I'm sure you'll enjoy it. --Sincerely, Matt Hazard"

Pause the game for the first time. "Hey...come back here and play!"

Complete all of the in-game tutorials. "Like I had any choice..."

Defeat an enemy using melee combat. "I don't need a stinkin' gun to deal with YOU!"

Perform 10 single-hit melee kills. "In Hazard Land, the hand can be used like a knife."

Defeat five enemies in a row using melee combat. "Not as fast as shooting...but it sure is satisfying."

Score 20 headshots. "A shot in the head is worth two in the chest."

Score 50 headshots. "That's using your head!"

Score 100 headshots. "Don't lose your head! Oh...too late."

Score two headshots with one bullet. "Eat lead...both of you!"

Kill 50 enemies with the Hazard pistol. "Frag you."

Kill 50 enemies with the shotgun. "That was a blast!"

Kill 50 enemies with the sub-machinegun. "You would think this one would have been automatic. Get it? Automatic? Nothing?"

Kill 50 enemies with the AK-47. "They might be socialists, but they make a pretty good gun."

Kill 50 enemies with the Sniper Rifle. "Zoom, pow! Right to the moon."

Kill 25 enemies using blind fire. "Sorry. Didn't see you standing there."

Destroy 20 destructible cover objects. "I know it's a waste of ammo...but I LOVE that de-rez effect!"

Kill an enemy with an explosive that also damages you. "That's gonna hurt me more than it hurts you. Well...maybe not quite as much."

Collect 20 Hazard pickups. "Maxx Karnage...sounds like a cool action hero name."

Defeat Sonny Tang. "Sonny, YOUR ass is kicked!"

Defeat Sting Sniperscope. "Your present ends now."

Complete both nightclub encounters without any of the dance-bots being destroyed. "Do dancing robots dream of disco sheep?"

Defeat General Neutronov. "From Hazard, With Love."

Defeat Sting Sniperscope again in Level 3. "Your present ends now. Again."

Score 20 single-shot Zombie kills. "Don't these things usually hang out in shopping malls?"

Escape from Dexter's mansion. "I gotta get me a house like THAT!"

Kill 50 enemies with the Energy Pistol. "Blaster? I hardly know 'er!"

Kill 50 enemies with the Plasma Rifle. "Plasma Rifles--they're not just for Space Marines anymore."

Defeat the Tentacle Beast of Tramm. "One-two shot right to the tentacles."

Defeat Altos Tratus. "Forecast for the next level: no more clouds."

"What do you mean the interrogation feature was cut?!? Here...just take the trophy."